Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Bang Bang Bang, Boom Boom Boom

Previously on the Superfriends-

Mandy is furiously trying to open a can of tuna for dinner. Rohan walks in, sees what his wife is making for dinner and calmly turns around and walks out.

At the Peters/Robinson bungalow, Christy throws another log on the fire and Brian saunters up to his lovely and massages her feet. Christy muses, "these are the days!" Brian retorts, "yes these are the days!" Brian exhales in the majesty of the night but is interrupted by the smoke of the fireplace. Christy frantically checks to see if her mate is ok to which Brian shakes off any ill effects and proceeds to lotion up his wife's feet.

Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix rips through the Superfriends studio and Brian is already in full show hosting duties.
Brian points to Mandy to be ready, nods at Christy as she drinks her coffee and fake football tosses with Troy. Seems like the crew is 100% ready to go.
Mandy interjects: Brian, why did you point at me?
Brian smacks his head
Troy: because you dope, he's making sure we're ready to go.
Mandy: don't call me a dope you long haire.......
Brian: knock it off you two..
Christy spins in her new chair that Brian bought for her, unknowingly spalshing coffee all over her computer screen.

Brian looks at everyone and wonders where he went wrong.

Mandy: are we doing Mandy's minute today?
Brian: maybe, but I thought we would go around the room and see what everyone got for Christmas this year?
Christy is hurriedly cleaning coffee off her computer. Troy is flipping through ESPN.
Mandy: well, I can see the respect oozing from everyones pores.
Brian: Mandy, I'll let you go first on presents received this year.
Mandy: ok, I got a watch, shoes, and a scarf from Rohan.
Troy goes next: Becca got me a Harley Davidson golf hat and bag, and game tickets to a Dallas Stars game.
Christy: I got fro my man, an Ulta gift card, scarf, sweater, tool box and 2 brand new kittens.
Mandy: he got you 2 new kittens......?
Brian: Mandy, lets let everyone finish ok!
Mandy gives Brian the #1 salute.
Brian: my hot got me; a new shirt, a pullover sweater, a treasure chest to put grandma goodies in and a DNA kit.
Troy: a DNA kit?
Mandy: does she not think you belong to your parents??
Christy: geeze you guys, it's a cool new thing called 23andme. You spit in a tube, send it off and it gives you results of your ancestry.
Troy: weird!
Brian: I like it thank you very much. we're not done though, we have our show gifts to unveil.
Christy: do we have too?
Mandy is giggling and clapping hands at the thought of receiving gifts.
Brian: yes my love, we must. I had Mandy, Mandy had Christy, Troy had me, Christy had Troy.
Troy whips out his gift for me and it's suite tickets to the upcoming Stars game.
Brian: wow, dude, thanks for thinking of me!
Troy: well, actually they're from  my work.
Brian schlumps in his chair.
Troy opens his gift and it's a Harley Davidson can opener.
Troy already puts it to use and cracks open a beer.
Christy opens her gift and it's a kitten bed for her new kittens.
Brian rejoices, thinking that the kitten bed won't be in the master bedroom with them while they sleep.
Christy already is drawing a map of where to put the kitten bed in the master bedroom.
Brian schlumps even further in his chair.
Mandy opens her gift from Brian thinking that it's going to be anything but something tuna. Mandy unwraps said gift and is amazed that it is a candle. (not knowing it's a tuna scented candle.)

Everyone fake smiles and side hugs all.
Troy is wearing his Harley can opener out.
Brian is rubbing his hands together for the Stars game. (not knowing its on opening night of the Star Wars film)
Christy has already raced home and has placed the kittens, named Bevo and fluffy, in the kitten bed on their masterbed. She neatly places them on Brian's side of the bed.
At home, Mandy lights her candle, basking in the glow of a non tuna gift this year from Brian. Rohan walks in and wonders what in the world that smell is?
Rohan: what is that sme....?
Mandy rushes over to the candle and takes in a deep whiff of the candle and is disgusted to find out it is indeed a tunafish scented candle. She shakes her fist up to the heavens and claims, "Brian, I'll get you for this!"

Join us next time on the Superfriends, as we celebrate our 8th year on the (fake) air. Will Mandy get even with Brian? Will Troy overuse his can opener? Will Christy get to keep the kitty bed in their bed? (*spoiler alert* answer is yes, always yes) And finally, will Brian choose going to see Star Wars or going with his long time bud and see the Stars game?

Til then, carry on and look to the heavens!

Sunday, December 20, 2015

Bizarro Christmas 2015

we open with a moment of silence in memory of the great Melba Higginbotham (better known as grandma)
 *moment of silence*

Bizarro Christmas has become a tradition here on this wildly successful blog site, so with the recent departure of my dear departed grandmother, this blog will be dedicated in her honor.

Bizarro Christmas cast includes:
Brian as Brandt
Christy as Chrystal
Mandy as Mindy
Rohan as Rod
Troy as Richard
Becca as Becky

featuring-
Roy as Rock
Travis as Trance
Rachel as Raquel

Brandt is glumly sitting in his new house, head in hand, gazing out the window. Chrystal walks by and pats her robust and handsome husband on his head and asks, "need anything dear?" Brandt responds, "yeah, my grandma!" Chrystal leans in and kisses her husband on the forehead and says a silent prayer for him.
Chrystal meanwhile is bustling around getting the house in order for Christmas festivities. Brandt arouses from his depressed state and cleans out the dishwasher. Brandt asks his beautiful wife, when everyone is coming over and she politely says, "7:30pm". Brandt realizes that is is 7:10pm and he hasn't even cleaned up yet.
Chrystal places a call to Mindy and reminds her to tell Rod not to brag about beating Brandt in their weekly basketball game. Mindy asks why and Chrystal tells her to look at the calendar. Mindy looks at her calendar and cant figure what Chrystal means.
Rod enters the room with Mindy staring at the calendar and mentions, "be nice to Brandt, this Christmas is the 1 year anniversary of his grandma passing." Mindy feels like a heel.

Chrystal has food and drink prepared, all the while Brandt has cleaned the house from pillar to post.

*door bell rings*
The first guests arrive and it is Richard and Becky. Richard is adorned in Harley Davidson golf shirt and slacks and Becky is wearing a pant suit. Mindy and Rod arrive shortly after with the tuna casserole in tow.
Chrystal asks MIndy, "I thought you weren't bringing that this year?" Mindy retorts, "what, everyone loved it last year!" Mindy doesnt realize that Brandt secretly deposited said casserole in the trash last year due to an ungodly stench.

All the guests have arrived and Rock is serving everyone up a frosty beverage. Trance is showing off his new Star Wars light saber, Raquel is rolling her eyes at the mention of Star Wars and Rod is telling anyone who will listen about the Australian gun policy.

Chrystal welcomes one and all to the feast and Brandt toasts his guests.

During the meal, good time and good eats was had by all. Stories of yesteryear and times bygone were told. Mindy expressed her love of all thing tuna, Rod talked nonstop basketball, Rock got another round of drinks, Raquel talked about the use of google, Richard made motorcycle noises with his mouth, Becky delighted all about tales of dogs, Chrystal enlightened all with knowledge and intellect, and Brandt ended with stories of his sainted grandma. Tears were shed, laughs were bellowed, and hugs were forced.

Brandt closed the evening with this bon mot, "Love all, and cherish everyone!"

Merry Christmas!


Sunday, July 26, 2015

Sister Christian

Previously on the Superfriends

Mandy is feverishly trying to call Brian to wish him a belated birthday.
Mandy rings up Brian on the ol' rotary.
"ring ring"
Brian carelessly looks at his phone to see an incoming call. He sees who is calling him and silences his phone. Christy asks, "who was that?" Brian responds, "wrong number."
 Mandy thinking Brian has answered his phone begins to wish him a happy birthday.
*Aside* Rohan is spinning a basketball on his finger while looking longingly out a window.
*Aside over*

Strumming through the Superfriends studio is Jimi Hendrix's Voodoo Child.
Brian: welcome one and all to another edition of the Superfriends radio show. To my left right your right is my goddess of a wife, Christy. 
Mandy is pointing to her right and then left to figure out who Brian is introducing.
Brian: technically directing is the bro of all bros, Troy and last but certainly least is the tiniest of the Superfriends, Mandy. (Mandy has made it around the room pointing at everyone realizing Brian has made it to her name in the intros.)
Brian: I have worked tirelessly on another show to serve up hot and fresh.
Troy: I got something hot and fresh for ya! (Troy makes a hasty retreat to the bathroom)
Mandy vomits in her mouth.
Christy is dry heaving in her chair.
Mandy: can we get to Mandy's minute?
Brian seeing the need to get the show back on track, remarks, " yes it's time, it's Mandy time!"
Mandy: why did you say it like that?
Christy: he didn't want to tell anyone but he's working on his vocals for a wrestling announcers audition.
Mandy can't believe what she just heard.
Christy can't believe what she just said.
Troy can't believe what he just did.
Brian is beyond embarrassed and tries to get back to Mandy's minute but she spends her minute laughing and guffawing so hard she snorts and bellows continuesly.
Christy feeling bad for her husband leaves to get a cup of coffee and another doughnut.
Troy is fully entrenched in his recliner half asleep.

Brian: well if you must know, I was sought out for an audition with the local wrestling organization. Some executive heard the show and liked my cords.
Mandy: your cords?
Troy is slapping at the air as if a bug has awakened him from his slumber.
Christy renters the room with doughnut glaze on her lips and full on coffee breath.
Brian: yes, they realized talent when they heard it and want me to come down tomorrow night. I get to introduce Kevin Von Erich, he's one of my bigge.....
Mandy: we know, we know! I thought they were all dead.
Brian throws off his headset in disgust, walks out in a huff.
Mandy: wow, is he really upset?
Christy shrugs her shoulders and wipes the glaze drool from her mouth.

Mandy and Christy sit in silence, Troy snoozes away and Brian is left to his own confidence rebuilding.

How will Brian's audition go? Is he really upset with Mandy? Will Christy notice the doughnut glaze on her mouth? Will someone wake Troy from sleep? Will we ever uncover Rohan's need for acceptance in the arena of basketball? 
All that and more next time on the Superfriends...

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Getting the lead out!

Previously on the Superfriends-
Mandy is doing some serious remodeling in her house. First up is shelves to be mounted on her living room walls. Always one to follow safety guidelines, she whips out a small ladder. Mandy position the ladder just so, tools in tow and......... crash! thump! arghhhh! kerplunk! toot!

Deep in the jungles of the most remote and desolate region of the Phillipines, a herd of tribesman have discovered an old radio. They stare at it with wonder and amazement. One of the elderly men shakes it and out comes some English that sounds very strong and competent. That voice is none other than Brian Peters, main host of the Superfriends radio show. All the men look at each other, beat their chests and make some tribal war call. Mandy's voice comes on to interrupt Brian and his reading of the Rangers box score and the men promptly throw the radio in the near by lagoon.

trickling through the studio air, Jimi Hendrix's Voodoo Child can be heard.
Brian: good morning to all. Welcome to another edition of the award winning Superfriends radio show. To my left your right at the helm is the always beautiful, athletic, and sexy Christy, technically directing from the mean streets of NRH, Troy and I'll be here but without further ado, let's give it up to the sidekicks of all sidekicks, yuck monkey extrodinairre, Mandy
Mandy whispers: no finger point this time Brian, I know when we're on the air!
Christy: hon, were on right now! ( wonders why she's involved in such trivial mess)
Mandy looks around and realizes that in fact we're live and on the air.
Brian: ok, let's get rolling! It's time for our new featured segment, Mandy's minute.
Troy: do we really have to do this minute thing?
Mandy: yes, it's been heavily requested by one and all.
Troy: by whom?
Brian: let's see, we have pockets of listeners in East Arlington, Waxahachie and some unintelligible areas.
Troy: seems like a big time waste to me.
Mandy: why don't you technically direct.
Troy: I am.
Christy: how old are we?
Brian: I'm 40, bout to be 41..
Christy: babe, that was a rhetorical question. (where's my coffee and happy pills?)

Mandy proceeds to enlighten and pontificate on today's hot social topics. She peruses Facebook, the home page for AOL and Soap Opera Digest.
Brian: well, seems like your minute is up and it's time for our second most favorite segment titled, Rangers box score with Brian.
Troy's ears perk up, Rohan comes running in with sincerity in his eyes.
Mandy vomits in her lap and Christy is seen throwing pencils into the ceiling.

Brian: well that all the time we have for today, join us next time for another side splitting, sports intensive, somewhat information minute of thought by your close knit group of Superfriends.

Christy is seen already out the door in full jogging apparel. Mandy is seen circling the tuna sandwich from yesterday. Brian, Troy and Rohan are seen giving back slaps, high fives and full frontal man hugs for another successful radio show in the books.

Will Christy  fully committ to the show? Or will she satiate her desire for travel? Will Mandy ever make something besides tuna fish? Will Brian expand his listening audience.

Not here, but over there, the elderly Phillipino tribesmen are once again aroused to the mania that is the Superfiends!!

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Rest in Peace

* QUICK ASIDE *

To live is to love. My sweet angelic grandmother passed onto the next plane on Christmas Eve 2014. She was my everything, my grandmother, mother, all encompassing parent and better yet my love. She had been in failing health for some time but somehow, still drove daily, worked part time and was the matriarch of our family. She is dining with the King of Kings and free from all pain. Hopefully heaven has a TV, so she can watch her beloved Days of Our Lives.

I dedicate all my future blogs in her name.


* QUICK ASIDE OVER *

Making his triumphant return to the Superfriends airwaves is the #1 Superfriend of all time, Brian!

Brian nervously writes down his thoughts for the show today. It has been too long since a show has aired and he feels the nerves clamping down on him.
Meanwhile in the Buck/Pegues abode, Mandy is busily making tuna casserole whilst Rohan works hard on his ever lacking basketball game.
Similarly, at the Peters/Robinson mansion, Christy is dishing up a batch of her gluten-free chocolate chip cookies. Erykah Badu music is blaring in the kitchen and Mrs. Peters Robinson is sexily making the aforementioned cookies.

Without further ado, it's time, it's SUPERFRIENDS TIME....

Jimi Hendrix's Voodoo Child is wafting through the Superfriends studio. (The Superfriends radio station is actually Brian & Christy's spare bedroom)

Mandy: I like what you have done with the place.
Brian: Mandy, can you wait til the red light comes on?
Mandy: I don't know what you mean? I'm mesmerized by your Kerry Von Erich poster.
Brian: alright, alright! Enough of this tomfoolery, it's time for the Superfriends radio show.
At the helm, is my beautiful wife, Christy, technically directing is North Richland Hill's own, Troy and I'll be here, but without further ado, let's give it up to the one and only Mandy....
Brian throws it to Mandy (finger point and all since she follows finger commands better)
With half a cheeto hanging out of her mouth, Mandy looks on perplexed.
Brian: Mandy, you're on!
Mandy inhales said cheeto without much of a single crunch.
Mandy: well, I think this calls for a special segment of the show. Is it my turn to talk about what I want to talk about?
Brian: yes! That's why I threw it to you...
Christy: my goodness, how did I get talked back into this slop?
Brian: babe, remember you're our new Superfriends Social Media Editor!
Troy: and what am I?
Mandy: well, I think you're a f........
Brian: ok, well we're back to our good ol' times I see. Let's start off with a segment, I like to call; Mandy's minute.
Mandy: wait a minute, I only get a minute?
Brian: well, right now, at the start of the show, you get the first segment and can talk about anything.
Mandy: hmmmmm, well I might need more than minute.
Troy: this is already a disaster
Mandy: pipe down Tiny!
Troy: hey, I've lost 25 pounds.
Mandy: well, you can kiss m......
Brian: ok, ok, looks like your minute is up! That's too bad, I wanted to hear about your secretive tuna casserole recipe.
Christy: ummmmmmm, this is not what I signed up for? I've got some trail running to do.
Troy: yeah, I need to test drive my new Harley...
Brian: fine, we'll meet again next week to discuss our new and improved Superfriends radio show!
Mandy feverishly drives home to have dinner made for Rohan before he gets home from work.

As the studio sits quietly and the air hangs over the room, Brian reflects on another attempt to revive his dream of a radio show with his closest friends.

He turns over a photo of his long missed grandmother. Puts his feet up on the desk and cracks open a cold Dr. Pepper. Instead of drinking the frothy beverage, he pours one out for his sweet grandma.

Next time on the Superfriends- Did Mandy make dinner in time for her beloved? Was Troy able to drive his new Harley? Is Christy going to subjugate herself to more of this riff-raff? Answers to these questions and more, next time on the Superfriends!