Monday, November 13, 2017

Whiskey River On My Mind

previously on the Superfriends:

at the Peters/Robinson residence
Brian: sweetie, have you mailed Mandy her birthday card yet?
Christy: not yet!
Brian: well, it's November 13 already....
Christy: ok, well remind me.
Brian: I thought that what was I was doi.......
Christy is vigorously washing and coloring her hair.

at the Pegues/Buck estate
Rohan: Mandy!! do we have to see Willie Nelson again this weekend?
Mandy: what?? you love Willie...
Rohan: I do but man, he talk sing his songs so.
Mandy: ugh
Rohan: plus, I don't like people being all up on me...
Mandy: Brian will be there!
Rohan: I'm there.......

Voodoo Child is strumming through the Superfriends studio
*dead air*
Mandy and Christy are looking around not knowing what to do, or say.
Troy is 10 minutes deep into a mid-day nap..
Mandy whispers: where is Brian?
Christy: last I heard or saw was he was posting about the Cowboys loss to Facebook.
Mandy: good grief..
Troy awakens from his slumber and notifies the crew that Brian has taken a personal day.
Mandy: a personal day?? what does that mean?
Christy: smh, he must be sore because the Cowboys lost.
Troy: it means he won't be here and ya'll are running the show AND I have a round of golf to play..
Mandy: run this big boy!! (gives Troy the 1 finger slaute)'
Christy: lets all act mature here ok, we'll be fine!
Mandy: he started it!
Christy smacks her head...

Christy runs down the show today. Thanksgiving Day recipes, Fixer Upper star Chip Gaines via telephone, and Mandy's half-minute.
Mandy: wait a minute! half-minute??
Christy explains: well, Brian said to declining segment ratings we had to cut the time in half!
Mandy schlumps in her chair
Christy expounds on the intricate details of how to properly make cornbread dressing for Thanksgiving..
Mandy eagerly awaits her turn for her half-minute segment
Mandy: ok, so in......
ring ring, ring ring...
Christy answers the Superfriends hot-line
on the other end is an excited happy caller
Christy: caller go ahead!
caller, in an exuberant girl voice: I'm back baby and there's nothing ya'll can do about it.
Christy: that's my man!
Mandy; so basically I'm not getting to do my segment?
Brian with a very hoarse voice: I've secured a radio deal to extend the Superfriends show for another 5 years!
Christy is seen mouth-cussing under her breath.
Mandy is dumbfounded yet excited because she will supposedly get to do her Mandy's minute.
Troy gets a text from Brian with the good news and promptly drives his golf cart into the 9th hole pond.
Rohan is ignoring any and all texts and instead is listening to his June concert videos of Metallica.

what does this mean for the future of the Superfriends? Will Christy get her mouth washed out with soap? Will Mandy get to reprise her segment? Is Troy ok after his golfcart fiasco? All that and much more next time on 93.8 the Superfriends.

Friday, September 15, 2017

Fantastical Feedback Friday

previously on the Superfriends:

at the Peters/Robinson house-
Brian: hon, have you finished packing up the bathroom?
Christy: come here!
Brian folding clothes, "babe?!"
Christy: come here!
Brian: I've made a pile of your folded underwear
Christy: I need you to help me get out of bed.....

at the Pegues/Buck residence
Rohan looking at Barkley boy: who's a good boy?
Mandy: Rohan, I've made breakfast. come and get it.
Rohan ignoring his wife: good boy, good boy!
Mandy: I'm not waiting....

piercing through the Superfriends studio is Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix
Mandy rudely interrupts: why do we have to keep playing this blasted song?
Brian looking on in horror at the sudden and vile interruption; Mandy, we've been doing this show for almost 10 years and it' a tradition.
Mandy; but....
Christy: and you know how Brian loves traditions....
Mandy: ugh.
after introducing the crew, Brian stands up and looks in the mirror at his new figure
Christy: there's my man!
Mandy vomits in her mouth
Troy: damn bro, looking good. (Troy subsequently looks at his own arms in comparison)
Mandy wipes vomit off her lips
Christy squeezes Brian's biceps

Mandy: ok, ok.... we get it, you've been working out!
Brian: I've been eating better too
Mandy: lol, sure....
Christy: he has, he has cut his cheese intake by 75%
Troy: whoa, thats awesome. wish I could do that.
Mandy giggles
Troy: who pulled your chain?
Brian: ok, enough! we have a show to run.
Christy: yes, today we will discuss healthy eating and some helpful tips on exercises.
Mandy: wait a minute, I thought you said you wanted me to review the Star Wars movies?
Brian: we do but we have 3 hours to fill.
Christy: 3 hours?? I have a body that needs some working out.
Brian: well, I can hel......
Mandy: gross
Christy: rude! and Brian, I'll hold you to that!
Troy: that's what she said
Brian giggles

Mandy finishes her review of the Star Wars movies.
Mandy: and with that is why I love Chewbaca the most.
Brian: what about Han Solo?
Mandy: what kind of name is that? Han Solo?? (laughs)
Brian looks on stunned
Christy: I can't believe you watched all 3 movies?
Mandy: well, I fast-forwarded it. Rohan filled me in.
Brian: what???
Christy: ok, well I can see this isn't going to end well. let's discuss some helpful tips.....
Brian standing up, this isn't fair, you promised.. I watched The Princess Bride and the deal was you watch Star Wars.
Christy: so to finish up, do deep knee bends
Troy hides under the table
Christy is laying on the floor doing crunches, still talking into the mic
Brian in full throat: MANDY PEGUES BUCK YOU'RE FIRED!!!!!
Mandy: you can't fire me because I QUIT!!
Brian: well, I fired you first...
Mandy: nuh uh
Christy is fed up with the juvenile behavior and leaves out the back door.
Troy has falled asleep under the table
Brian and Mandy scream argue about who fired or quit first..

Next time on the Superfriends; Will Mandy and Brian repair the damage of their argument? Will the show continue in it's current format? Will Christy return? Will Troy wake up in time to see what has transpired? Will the show go on? Join us next time as we get answers to these very serious questions.....

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Enter Sandman

previously on the Superfriends-

at the Peters/Robinson residence:
Brian: hey babe, what do you have planned for today?
Christy: just a little of this and a little of that.
Brian wonders what that means
Christy: what do you have planned?
Brian: I don't know, what do you want to do?
Christy: ugh, I'm gonna go work out.
Brian: can I come with you?
Christy: you gonna do some cardio?
Brian: ...........

Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix  is strumming through he Superfriends studio.
Mandy: hold up, hold up. I would like to restart the show!

Loco-motion by Australia's Kylie Minogue screeches through the Superfriends studio
Mandy: that's better! I'm here twisting and tweaking basically running this darn thing today.

Brian has been suspended for a week due to overt and controversial political  social media posts.
Troy is boycotting said suspension of Brian.
Christy is trapesing higher and yon throughout Southeast Asia.

*aside over*

Mandy: today on the show, I have a few guest hosts. My sister Rachel, who will bestow her knowledge of all things google and my loving mother Jonell, who will edify us on her recipe of "ding do..." I mean hostess cake. We'll also go to the phones for fantastical fun with phones.
Rachel: Mandy, is where I come in?
Mandy: ugh, Rachel, we went over this in the per-show meeting, I'll point to you and then you speak!
Rachel: pre-show meeting? You said come early and bring whataburger breakfast burritos.
Mandy: ugh!
Jonell: Jesus loves you!
Mandy: momma, not yet, I, suppose to point!
Jonell: pointing is rude....
Mandy: well, that's what Brian does to me letting me know when to speak.
Rachel: anyways, can we get to my google spot here.
Mandy: O Rachel, I just said that so you would come help me, I can't do this alone!
Rachel: you mean you don't need all this info and data that I researched? Wait, isn't this show fake anyways?
Jonell: Mary Amanda Pegues Buck, you be nice to your sister and no pointing!
Mandy: but, Bria......
Jonell: no buts here young lady.....
the studio phone rings- *ring ring*

Mandy: yes caller, go ahead!
Caller: (in a high pitched yet scruffy voice) my name is Briana
Mandy: wait a min....
Jonell: Mandy, don't be rude, caller go ahead...
Briana: can I read the Rangers box score?
Mandy: BRIAN!!!! you're suspended remember???
Briana: (voice cracking) my name is Briana not Brian...
Jonell: Mandy, I need to run, I have my weekly bingo game down at the church about to start.
Briana: ( in a svelte man's voice) what about the ding don.... I mean hostess cake recipe?
Mandy: busted! I knew it, I knew it....
Rachel and Jonell quietly exit the studio while Mandy keeps maniacally screaming into the phone, " its you Brian, its you........"

Join us next time on 93.8 the Superfriends! Will Brian be reinstated? Will Troy end his boycott? Will Christy regail us with stories of her southeast Asia trip? All that and much more......

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Futuristic Superfriends

This blog post is dedicated to my friends; Christy, Troy, Rohan and Mandy. We look to the future at our 80 year old selves. The year is 2055, set in the DFW metroplex.

Previously on the Superfriends-
Mandy: Rohan, where are my glasses?
Rohan: huh? I can't hear you...
Mandy: I said, where are my glasses?
Rohan: Mandy, you put them with your cane by the bed.
Mandy: but I'm not by the bed!
Rohan nods off to sleep whilst reading the morning newspaper.
Mandy hurriedly looks for her glasses. She doesn't want to be late for press conference with StarKist Tuna. Mandy doesn't realize her glasses are on the top of her head.

Meanwhile in the Cliffs of the Oak,  Brian is struggling to put on his depends on.
Christy: babe, you need help?
Brian: no, I can do it! (Brian stands up but his pants fall down)
Christy: well I need to run, my ultra marathon group training starts at 11:00am.
Brian: go ahead, I just need to pull my atrophied leg over to get the pants leg up.

Strumming through the dusty studio an oldie but goodie plays- Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix

Brian fumbles for the microphone and Mandy stretches her cane out to steady herself to sit in her Posterpedic foamed chair.
Mandy: dad blasted cane! I can never count on you!
Brian: welcome one and all to another award winning edition of the Superfriends.
Mandy: Brian, we haven't won an award since way back in 2017.
Brian: we've been doing this show since 2008, 47 long years!
Mandy: well, some of us have moved on to bigger and better things.
Brian: well, ever since Troy left to the mountains of Colorado to grow the happy grass, I've had to technically direct the show.
Mandy: where is Christy this time?
Brian: well she is speaking in Norway at a social media summit with the Norwegian president.
Mandy slowly claps but knocks her glasses off. "I can't see a darned thing!"
Brian: where is Rohan?
Mandy: well, he is moderating a local police officer community outreach Q & A. He's been retired for 22 years now.
Brian: don't brag, its unbecoming. On today's show we celebrate the 25th anniversary of the Cowboys winning the Super Bowl for the 5th time.
Mandy: do we have to? ever since they moved to Austin, they don't feel like the Dallas Cowboys.
Brian: well, they're still the Dallas Cowboys to me. Jerry Jones might be 108 but he is still the owner and GM.
Mandy: hey look, we have a caller on line 1.
Brian: hello caller, state your name and business.
Caller: dude, man, it's me Troy man....
Brian with a tear in his eye- "bro, I'm so glad to hear your voice!"
Troy: yeah man, I haven't shaved my beard in 9 years...
Mandy: gross!
Brian: bro, I bet that looks awesome...
Mandy reaches over and hangs up the phone without Brian knowing.
This goes on for 14 minutes.
Mandy decrepitly shuffles out of the studio so she can make her Starkist Tuna press conference. She is set to announce 2055's winner of the years supply of tuna.
Brian realizes he's been talking to a phone with nobody on the other end. He also notices he has been sitting in his own urine soaked Depends. With a defeated stare, he reminisces on the years gone by and begins to count the days to when his silver haired vixen returns home from her Norwegian trip.

Next time on the Superfriends- When will Christy return from Norway? Who won the years supply of tuna? Will Troy ever shave his beard? Will Brian acknowledge his wasted years and life on a failed fake radio show? All that and more on 93.8 the Superfriends......

Monday, January 2, 2017

Masterpiece Theatre

previously on the Superfriends-

Mandy giddily shouts to Rohan, " I finally have a sponsor for 5k I'm putting on!"
Rohan: oh yeah! Is this for that stupid fake radio show?
Mandy looking confused answers: yes.....
Rohan: I'm going deer hunting.
Mandy contemplates telling her beau who the sponsor is but decides to wait so she can announce on the show.

Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix wafts energetically throughout the studio
Brian introduces the crew: to my right your left my beautiful wife, producer of all things Superfriends, Christy. (Mandy is seen pointing to her right and left in a confused state) technically directing is my mister from another sister, Troy, and finally playing second fiddle, Robin to my Batman, Mandy.
Christy: can we get on with things? I have things to do, places to be.
Brian: hon, it's just a rerack of our famous crew.
Mandy: we're famous?
Troy has already turned on Sportscenter and turned off his mic.

Brian: on he show today we'll discuss all things Cowboys, our Christmas holiday vacation and Mandy has a big announcement.
Christy: do we have to discuss the Cowboys? ITS SO BORING!
Mandy claps uncontrollably in agreement with Christy.
Brian: babe, you can cut out early if you like.
Christy is halfway out the building as her chair swivels in delight.
Brian looks on with sad face.
Troy is slumped over asleep with remote in hand.

As Brian and Mandy finish up their holiday vacation talk, Mandy is ready for her announcement.
Brian: ok Mandy, you ready?
Mandy: yes finally. I have my whole family listening!
Brian: really?
Mandy: well, just my mama. Ro is deer hunting, Rachel is raising three kids, and Travis cuffing and stuffing bad people.
Brian: well, we're waiting...
Mandy: my big sponsor for my Superfriends 5k is (muffled sounds come from Mandy's microphone)
Brian: could you repeat that please.
Mandy: what happened? I practiced this at least 10 times.
Brian looks over at her microphone and sees Troy in his stupor has accidentally turned down her volume on the mic....
Mandy: (in full throat) TROY!!!
Troy awakens hastily and gets ina fitting stance not knowing what he has done.
Brian: Mandy, it's been fixed, go ahead.
Mandy: drum roll please-
Brian looks around and decides to make drum noises with his mouth/lips
Mandy: Today, January 2, 2017 my official sponsor for the annual Superfriends 5k is Starkist Tuna!
Brian looks on in admiration
Mandy: well, after all these years, I kind of like tuna. Starkist will be handing out a year supply of tuna to the runner with the best time.
Brian: ok, when is the date for this exciting 5k?
Mandy: you mean, I have to come up with the date too??

Join us next time as we see if Mandy has come up with a date for the race. Why did Troy awaken ina fighting stance? Will Christy be back? Will Brian help his diminuative friend with a race date? All this and more next time in 93.8 the Superfriends....

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Bizarro Christmas 2016

Another year and another Truly Bizarro Christmas

Editor's note-
After last years dedication to my dearly departed grandma, this years edition is dedicated to my beautiful wife's dad, who left us in March 2016. RIP John Robinson. I don't mean to sully your name by dedicating a mere blog to you but here we are.

Bizarro cast as follows-
Brian as Brandt
Christy as Chrystal
Mandy as Mindy
Rohan as Rod
Troy as Richard
Becca as Becky

Special appearance by
Rachel as Raquel
Travis as Trance
Roy as Rock

Due to budgetary constraints and belt tightening, Brandt has decided to have his annual yearly Christmas dinner at their new house. ChrystaI is less enthused.

Brandt: Chrystal, don't worry about the house cleaning, I said I'd do it.
Chrystal: who's worried?
Brandt: I'm going to play some Christmas music to liven things up! Have you sent out invites.
Chrystal: hon, nobody sends out invites anymore.
Brandt: then how does everyone know when to come?
Chrystal: they...... just show up.
Brandt looks at his loving wife confused

Meanwhile at the Buck residence Mindy is feverishly tryinto find a word that starts with Q for her Words with Friends game with Brandt. Rod walks in and asks what's for dinner.
Rod: hey mindy, what's for dinner?
Mindy: shhhhhh, I'm trying to concentrate.
Rod: are you playing that dumb Words with Friends game again?
Mindy: well, Brandt beats me so, that I just have to beat him! he's toooooo good.
Rod shuffles off with left over grilled chicken and veggies.
Mindy is perplexed by said game.

At the Matheny household, Becky is wondering if they will be invited to Brandt and Chrystal for Christmas dinner.
Becky: Richard, do you think Brandt will invite us this year?
Richard: babe, I don't know, you do tend to pick on him about his long shorts, beard and fear of heights.
Becky is dumbfounded by the accusations.
Richard: I'll FaceTime him and see.
Becky: we'll do it soon, because if not I have a wine social to go to.
Richard is already asleep in his recliner.

Back in the OC (Oak Cliff) Chrystal is netflixing while Brandt swiffers the floors.
Brandt: sweetie, have you notified everyone yet? I'm worried that I'm doing all this for nothing.
Chrystal pauses her show to tell her hunk of a man that, yes she messaged everyone.
Brandt: for tomorrow right?
Chrystal: no, tonight! Tomorrow, we have Christmas at my family's.
Brandt: ugh, I haven't even prepared the mac n cheese!
Chrystal: it's not hard babe, I could just open a box of Kraft and whip some up.
Brandt with eyes popping out of his head says, "mac n cheese doesn't come out of a box!"
Chrystal calls Mindy and reminds her about tonight and to bring some gluten free cookies.
Brandt calls Richard to do their weekly football picks and Richard immediately celebrates to Brandt due to having finally beaten Brandt for the first time in 15 years of doing picks.

At the Vidaurri abode, Trance asks his wife Raquel why Brandt never invites him to the many restaurants that he goes to.
Raquel: do you care that much? Really?
Trance: actually I do, I need male friends.
Raquel: awwww, you do have male friends- you have Rod and Rock.
Trance: I guess but Brandt just has this aura about himself.
Raquel: Brandt?? Surely you jest! I mean he's tall, that's about all he has going.
Trance: and that beard.....

Rock hasn't checked his phone messages in 3 days due to his new girlfriend occupying his time. Thus missing out on the Christmas dinner at Brandt's.

Trance, Raquel, Mindy, Rod, Becky and Richard all make way to the OC for the Christmas dinner.
Chrystal welcomes everyone with hi-fives and side hugs.
Raquel comments on the state of the neighborhood.
Trance immediately corners Brandt for affirmation.
Mindy and Rod already plot their time of departure. They have a puppy dog at home who needs special love and attention. (Hi Blackley)
Richard and Becky head for the fridge and the moonshine.

Everyone sits at the table and commences eating. Much awkward laughter and side giggles ensue. Trance tries in vain to get Brandt's attention to discuss the latest Star Wars movie.
Rod is ignoring Richards attempts to talk about his Harley Davidson.
Chrystal is nodding and eye sleeping as Mindy revels in her 20 minute story about last nights episode of Blacklist.
All in all a good time was had. The group sings Christmas carols and takes numerous selfies. As the last guest is ushered out, Chrystal pours one out for her dear dad. Brandt walks up next to his bride and hugs her as they embrace and enjoy some Whitman's chocolates and listen to some classic Slim Whitman.
Brandt looks over his shoulder and looks out the window and a shooting star streaks across the nights sky. He nods and looks back at the picture of grandma and smiles.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Saturday, August 13, 2016

Stranger Things

Previously on the Superfriends,

At the Buck/Pegues residence
Mandy: Ro, did you call Brian and Christy about dinner?
Rohan totally ignoring Mandy: that's a good boy! (patting Barkley)
Mandy: Ro!!
Rohan: sit, no sit.... (motioning to Barkley boy)
Mandy on a stepladder: Rohan, will you get me my book. I can't reach it.
Rohan: what? I can't hear you....
Mandy farts and falls down
Rohan: you ok?

Voodoo Child is strumming through the Superfriends studio
Brian: welcome one and all to another award winning edition of the Superfriends.
Mandy: what awards have we won?
Christy: Mandy we obviously haven't won an award, Brian is just using hyperbole..
Mandy feverishly looks up hyperbole on the internet.
Troy is firing up the tv's for the Olympics.
Mandy: must you turn on the tv's the second the show comes on?
Troy defiantly cracks open a beer and triumphantly uses the remote to turn the volume up.
Christy: settle down everyone, I have some good news...
Brian in his Roscoe P. Coltrane voice: good news, good news.
Mandy: ummmmm, what was that?
Christy: I'm going to California to see my niece Keena and work from a wine villa in Napa Valley!
Brian: ummmm, when is this?
Christy: tonight!
Troy: oh boy, here we go.
Mandy giggles
Brian: couldn't you have told me before the show started?
Christy: I tried, but you wanted to watch wrestling!
Brian: shhhhhh, they were doing a Von Erich special.
Christy: well, they're all dead except Kent.
Brian: Kent????
Troy: uh oh!
Mandy giggles
Christy: Kent, Kerry or whoever....
Brian is devastated at the turn of events 
Christy: my flight leaves in an hour. So come on help me pack!
Brian: what about the show?
Christy: I have left Mandy in charge.
Troy slams his beer down and says, "I'm out!"
Mandy giggles
Christy and Brian head out to pack, Mandy prepares for her show and Troy leaves a trail of beer tears.

Will Brian stop watching wrestling due to the unfortunate events? Will Christy enjoy her time in Napa? Will the show crater with Mandy at the helm? Will Troy return? All those answers and more on the next episode of the Superfriends.